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Triumph During Transitions

Apr 6, 2015

shan photo Create The Life You See When You Close Your Eyes and Dream

There are intrusions and unexpected events that take us off our course from moving toward what we want in life. Professionally, we may get a new boss or job, be dealing with declining budgets, go into business for ourselves, or retire. Personally, we may be struggling in marriage, with a blended family, dealing with divorce, being an “empty nester’ or grieving the loss of a loved one.
At certain pivotal points in life, the intensity and duration of change can sometimes cause us to react with increased anxiety, anger and fear. This is only natural.
We all get derailed. Depending on the impact of the event our ability to face what happened will vary. During these times, how can we align who we are with what we’re facing?

1. Acceptance: Tony Robbins says, “Change is inevitable. Progress is optional”.
Accepting the reality of change is the key to gracefully dealing with change.                                               Change is Inevitable
Think of maneuvering through change like practicing the martial art of
Aikido. When you move with the flow of what is coming at you, rather than
retreat or fight, your resistance lessens and your ability to face it strengthens.

2. Choose a new mindset: A mindset is a defined as a way of thinking that determines one’s behavior, outlook, and mental attitude. What are some positive things that could come out of this difficult situation? One option is to view it as a wake-up call in order to cause us to ask ourselves if the course we have been on still has the same meaning for us. Consequently, does the unexpected change offer a new opportunity?

3. Annihilate your negative self-talk: Begin by challenging your thought life. Ask if what you are saying to yourself is even true. Suppose you tell yourself, “I never do anything right!” The truth is that you do lots of things right. What would your life be like if you no longer believed the lie?

4. Connect with others: The company and comfort of others who understand what you are going through can be a transforming experience. It is human nature to band together in times of crisis. Although it is natural to isolate and retreat, the best thing you can do for yourself is to reach out to another or join a group. When talking to those that have come through a challenging situation, they attribute a great deal of their success to the support of an individual or a group.
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5. Focus on progress instead of perfection: Perfection does not exist; instead,
focus on your capacity for progress. Progress is a goal that can be achieved
each day. Work toward an outcome of progress, instead of a perfect one.

6. Practice Gratitude: EckhartTolle said, “It is through gratitude for the present moment that the spiritual dimension of life opens up.” In the presence of difficulty, what is the good that you can be grateful for today?

 

Contact Shan today to schedule a complimentary “Transition Challenge” session.

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Masterful Mindsets While in Transition

Mar 23, 2015

shan photo Create The Life You See When You Close Your Eyes and Dream

 Masterful Mindsets While in Transition

Mindset is one of the most important aspects of your life. With a successful mindset, possibilities are endless. Without it, you will find yourself in perpetual frustration and a sense of never really moving forward. Think of your mindset as your rudder on the boat of your life. Used properly, it will guide you to your ultimate destination. Used improperly, it will cause you to go in circles.

After studying some masters on mindset, I have put together some vital principles of a strong and successful mindset, especially when you’re dealing with challenging changes and transitions:

1. Purpose: If you can’t answer the question of “why” you are doing what you’re doing, the  Why
“how” will lack passion. Rick Warren, author of, “The Purpose Driven Life”, said “…without
purpose, life has no meaning. Without meaning, life has no significance or hope.” It is imperative to dig deep and understand why you are doing what you are doing. Once the root reasons are revealed, the “how” will flow naturally.
2. Prioritize: Everyday, do the thing that you don’t want to do the most. Brian Tracy, trainer & author,
has likened this habit tofrog “eating the frog”. If you figuratively eat the frog first thing in the morning,
everything else tastes wonderful to you and will feel easy in comparison.

3. Persistence: The mindset of success doesn’t ask “IF”, instead it asks “HOW”. If you are
asking yourself, “IF I overcome this challenge in my life?”, then consider a shift in yoursun
mindset. Instead ask, “HOW can I overcome this challenge in my life?”
Diana Nyad, the 60 year old swimmer, who swam from Cuba to Florida in 53 hours, said, “Find a way!” She said, “If it’s important to you, we can all get there…jelly-fish, sea-sickness, pain, cold…find a way.”
Perception 4. Perception (Self): Negative self-perception is the universal human condition of not feeling good enough or deserving. One of the best ways of discovering how you truly perceive yourself is to monitor your thought-life. Be brutally honest with yourself and audit how much negative
self-talk is occurring. Remember Henry Ford’s famous quote: “The unexamined life is not
worth living.”
5. Procrastination: This is my favorite! Steven Pressfield, in the “The War of Art”, said that inProcrastionation
reality, procrastination is an internal force called “Resistance”. He goes on to explain
that we feel resistance most strongly when we are about to dare greatly or grow
spiritually! The first time I fell into procrastination, after reading this, I tried it. I have to admit to you, I just got plain stubborn about it. So, I MADE myself do what I was avoiding, and I really did expand as a person. The next time you procrastinate, try pushing through, and see what comes out of it.

6. Perfection Paralysis: Tony Robbins, says it the best: “Perfectionism isn’t about healthy striving
for excellence… it is a way of thinking and feeling that says, ‘If I look perfect, do it perfect, work
perfect, and live perfect’, I can minimize shame, blame and judgment.” Perfection does not
exist. Instead, focus on your capacity for excellence. Excellence is a goal that can be achieved
each day. Consider working towards an excellent outcome, instead of a perfect one.

Remember, if you can train the rudder of your mindset in positive and forward-moving ways, the boat of your life will reach the destination of your dreams!

Shan is a certified life coach specializing in guiding women through challenging changes and transitions. Contact her today to schedule a complimentary “Get Acquainted” session.

 

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